Yolk by Mary H.K. Choi

What is it about?

Estranged sisters Jayne and June are forced to reconcile when June is diagnosed with cancer. 

OK, but what is it really about?

Jayne and June are sisters who both live in New York but haven’t seen each other for quite some time. Their lives couldn’t be more different: Jayne is a student, shares a tiny apartment with her good-for-nothing on-and-off boyfriend and a bunch of roaches. Her elder sister June, on the other hand, seems to have it all: a demanding, but well-paid job in finance and a high-rise apartment with a lovely view of the city. But when June is diagnosed with uterine cancer, Jayne is the only one who can help her. Left with no other choice than to live together, the sisters must confront their past, that is riddled with family secrets, their present, where old wounds that never fully healed threaten to forcefully open, and an idea of how their future might look like. 

Is it any good?

The author’s note on the first page already got me: Mary H.K. Choi warns readers that the book deals with serious issues, partly based on her own experience: “For those struggling with body image and food, this story might be emotionally expensive for you. Please be gentle with yourselves – sensitivity is a superpower. And please know that there is no such thing as a bad body. Truly. Take up space, it is your birthright.”

And then, we dive headfirst into the story, told from Jayne’s point of view. The novel touches on many topics: mental health issues, illness, immigration and cultural heritage, complicated family relationships, and finding your way – and yourself – in an often unforgiving world. The author approaches these issues with clarity and authenticity. “Yolk” often feels raw, sometimes brutally honest and even uncomfortable, but never not relatable. 

“Yolk” also lays bare the deep flaws of the US healthcare system, starting with June who loses insurance after she is laid off from work. Never mind that she is diagnosed with cancer and drowning in medical bills. Jayne, who tries to get a grip on her mental health issues, sees a therapist, but as she slowly makes progress, she is informed that her health insurance only covers eight sessions. If she wants to continue, she needs to pay for them herself – something Jayne, who is still studying, clearly can’t afford. It’s frustrating.

Jayne and June’s complex relationship is at the centre of this book. Their encounters, conversations and shared memories often left me dumbfounded, but they also warmed my heart and made me cry – at one point, I was actually weeping. Because of the end of the day, they are sisters who share such a strong bond that it doesn’t matter what may have happened in the past. Even in moments when they don’t like each other, they still love each other. 

With this engrossing coming of age tale, Mary H.K. Choi has delivered a real gem. I love the author’s descriptive language. Every sentence and every word in this book feels like it absolutely needs to be there.

Favorite character?

I loved Jayne. Yes, she was a mess, but that was exactly her appeal. Her flaws made her so human, so real – someone to root for wholeheartedly. I also enjoyed the dynamics between her and Patrick, who was only a secondary character, but one that was a bright spot in all the darkness. He also was somewhat of a mess, but maybe that was the reason why he and Jayne are such a good match. As individuals, they are adrift, floating through life aimlessly, trying to make the best out of it. Together, they simply make sense.

Most memorable quotes?

This whole book is quotable, but here are two that really resonated with me:

“It’s not at all what I thought it would be. Nothing is. No matter how much I love it, it doesn’t love me back. If I weren’t so broken, it would fit. I feel like I don’t have a home.”

“I thought a polished appearance and stellar behavior would be the passport to belonging. And when I inevitably failed at perfection, I could at least wilfully do everything in my power to be kicked out before anyone left me.”

Conclusion? 

Every time I finish reading a book that affected me deeply, I wonder: had I picked this up at a different time, would I still feel the same about it? Would I have cried as much? Would I have been enraged to the same degree? I guess I’ll never know the answer, but all I can say is that “Yolk” was an emotional rollercoaster, but in the best possible way.

This is the first novel by Mary H.K. Choi I have read, and all I can think is, WHY? Why haven’t I heard of her before? Better late than never, I guess. I’m most definitely going to add her other books, “Emergency Contact” and “Permanent Record” to my wishlist. 

Trigger warning: cancer, racism, eating disorders, mental illness, parental abuse

AT A GLANCE

Title: Yolk

By: Mary H.K. Choi

Published by: Atom (2021)

Pages: 400

Language: English